Don't ignore conflicts. Deal with them before they get out of control!

Designing instead of emergency rescue
Don't ignore conflicts. Deal with them before they get out of control!

Conflicts don’t arise without a cause,
and don’t disappear until the cause is addressed.

 

 

 

Don’t ignore conflicts. Deal with them before they get out of control!

 

When problem-solving everyday issues become a tug-of-war over who is right and who is wrong, then settling even the smallest of discussions becomes a battle. Don’t ignore conflicts. Deal with them before they get out of control!

William James meant; “Whenever you’re in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make the difference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factor is an attitude.” So far so good, but which one, please?

 

 

 

Fight or flight?

 

Conflict is a natural aspect of relationships. As human beings, we are primed to respond to stress with a “fight” or “flight” response. Often, neither of these choices is appropriate in today’s world. Therefore, we need to find a way to address conflict that is direct and assertive, while also respectful and diplomatic. Some people fear conflict and go to great lengths to avoid it, which can backfire and lead to emotional, relational, and medical problems. If handled effectively, conflict can be an opportunity for learning, growth, and positive change.

 

 

 

You can’t really win a conflict

 

You can’t really win a conflict. Winning a conflict is getting the outcome you want, regardless of what the other person wants, which can be gratifying, sure. But the problem is that the underlying issue has not been solved. It will simply reappear later over some other topic. Much better than winning a conflict in private and business life is resolving it.

 

 

 

How about you?

 

Think of your own life. Who are you in conflict with? Imagine working things out, to resolve those conflicts. Think of the impact on all your relationships. Peace starts with each of us, and sometimes we need to take the first step. As Gandhi once said, “We must be the change we wish to see in others.”

Preparation of important conversations and negotiations

 

Communication can be very easy. But often it is not. Sometimes we say things and then later notice from the reaction of our conversation partners that they seem to have spoken to someone completely different. I didn't say that with the best will in the world. - Or did I say that after all?

More or less consciously, conversations are about convincing other people of something - be it a special offer, your personality, a perspective, or a necessity. If this doesn't happen fast enough and above all not exactly to the point and descriptively, the person we are talking to quickly loses interest, and we lose the hoped-for opportunity. — Conversation failed.

You can let me support you in the preparation of your conversations and negotiations (to be on the safe side: no legal advice!). Find out how you and your message are perceived (arguments, body language, language, voice, and much more). I will familiarize you with effective tools and communication strategies. Develop your psychological skills, learn to stay calm, act confidently, remain authentic, and finally convince.

P.S.

 

How do you deal with conflicts?

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This article is a short excerpt from the more comprehensive course materials my clients receive in a group or individual training or coaching.

Published: June 21, 2001
Author: Karsten Noack
Revision: August 14, 2019
Translation: ./.
German version: 
K: 
H: 
T: RR
#1890

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